Man-flu: A manalysis

The man-flu.

Such a terrible, horrific and emotionally tormenting time for a man. It’s a period that occurs maybe once or twice a year in a man, that a woman will never understand – no matter how much she tries.

A man, suffering from man-flu

A man, suffering from man-flu (c) Daily Mail

How can this be? How is it that the woman, the gender that is pegged in society to be the more caring, gentle of the two genders – react so cold-heartedly and without remorse? Is it a “girl thing”? Does the man-flu give the opportunity for women to assert dominance over their attached male counterpart? Or does it even expose the truth about women, in that image of women in general that is portrayed to us by the media is all a huge flaw?

Man: I’m so ill. I can hardly move, my head is hurting and I can’t taste or smell anything.

Woman: Shut the fuck up. Be a bastard “man” for twats-sake. What’s wrong with you? Go and do the garden.

As I sit here typing this, I’m surrounded by the products of a man suffering from man-flu. There are tissues everywhere, a plentiful supply of food, [insert favourite supermarket here] “MAX” Cold & Flu capsules, juices, oranges and an array of Vitamin C – anything to stop me from leaving my room and infecting the outside world with my terrible illness. I believe making ample effort on my part to get better, but will the opposite sex acknowledge this?

Google Search for Man Flu

Google Search for Man Flu

Much research has been done on man-flu, and it only takes for you to type “does man” in Google for it to correctly predict what you’re going to ask it (in this scenario), and the first three results to claim that it does exist (apart from that first result, but that’s from the Daily Mail to begin with). Now, the actual reasons for the behaviour of man-flu can be questioned from one study to another, however one thing is for sure and is common amongst all men – and that is we get hit harder than women when we become ill, both physically and emotionally.

Whether this is due to the way our DNA in made up, or the way each genders brain and body deals with such an experience (I guess that comes back to the way our DNA is made up), I will continue to fight the good fight for the man-flu and protest its validity and genuineness for the foreseeable future.

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